Grown Ups (1/5)

***Note: A Few Minor Spoilers***

What happens when you get Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Chris Rock, David Spade, and Rob Schneider and their families together?  Grown Ups happens.  As you can imagine, it is not pretty….

The film opens up with the main characters as children playing on a basketball team together.  Apparently they are pretty good, thanks to their coach, “Buzzer” (who you may know as shawn’s dad from boy meets world or just as “that guy from Roseanne”) Flash forward to present day.  Buzzer had died, so the team comes together once again to…go on vacation?  Wait…why are they going on vacation.  This guy dies and they are throwing a freak’in party.  They even find themselves making loud jokes at the funeral, basically mocking the coach that supposedly is their idol.  It is at this point that you realize, these are all bad people.

Really quickly you learn that all of their kids are rude little brats.  Being the parents, they blame this on violent video-games, TV, and texting.  They decide they want to straighten their kids out so they…take them to a bar?  WAIT WHAT?!  No, these kids are not brats because of the media, they are brats because their parents are bad people.  (and no, they do not learn a valuable lesson about being a responsible adult like the title might suggest)  I cannot stress how bad these people are.  Every time I think they can’t get any worse they somehow manage to top the last evil thing they did.  They are always making fun of each other and fighting in a way that is supposed to mirror how real friends pick at each other…instead they just go for the low blows and beat the crap out of each other.  You would think they all hate each other and are just on vacation together because its in the scrips…oh wait…

Actually they are all pretty disturbed.  Rob Schneider is married to a woman twice his age which in results in some pretty sick jokes.  Kevin James’ four year old son still breastfeeds.  Chris Rock is a stay at home mom.  And Adam Sandler is…well, Adam Sandler.

Also, this film thrives on stereotypes.  First thing I noticed is that every videogame in the film is an over-violent murder simulator.  (lets hope Jack Thompson doesn’t see this)  Kevin James is the source of an insane number of Fat jokes.  Chris Rock can’t go one scene without pointing out the fact that he is Black.  Adam Sandler owns a asian slave, er, I mean nanny who lives with them and obeys their every command…or else…The list of stereotypes goes on and on and on…

There is not much of a plot either.  There is no real conflict…in fact, I don’t even think this is a fictional movie.  I think these actors really went on vacation together and this is the home movie.  I mean there is sorta a subplot involving a basketball game, but it bears no real significance.

The Jokes tend to fail pretty often.  Sure some of them hit but most of them miss, and the ones that do make you laugh are not so much “ha ha thats funny” so much as “ha ha they acually decided to put that in the film.  Half of the Jokes you can see coming from a mile away, and half of them are just disturbing.  (yes, there are poop/pee jokes…and an embarrassing amount of them…I have lost all respect for Kevin James…)

All in all, Grown Ups tried.  It really tried to create a good comedy, and it failed in my opinion.  While it is funny from time to time, it is just too disturbing to be any good.

For the record while this movie is TERRIBLE, I am not necessarily suggesting you avoid it.  Don’t watch it on your own, and definitely do not watch it with kids.  Instead do what we did, gather your funniest friends around the TV and Mystery Science Theater that puppy.  Seriously, this film just begs to me made fun of.

So gather your friends, pop the popcorn and prepare to laugh at (not with) the cast of Grown Ups.  Or just go see a real movie…your choice…

10 Responses to “Grown Ups (1/5)”

  1. July 25, 2010 at 8:17 pm

    This was one of the worst movies I have ever seen!

  2. July 26, 2010 at 8:10 am

    I still havent seen it yet. But after reading this review im dissapointed. I was really looking forward to this film the cast was awesome. 😦 *sigh* im sad now.

  3. July 26, 2010 at 8:48 am

    Totally agree, really great review very funny great job man. This movie definitely had lots and lots of problems.

  4. July 26, 2010 at 1:06 pm

    Yeah, it really was a stinker. But if you are going to watch a bad movie, it is best to watch it with funny friends so I am glad we decided to watch it.

  5. July 26, 2010 at 4:31 pm

    I’m in the process of writing my review. I’m leaning with a 2 out of 5 mainly because the film is enjoyable on some level.

  6. July 26, 2010 at 6:11 pm

    Yes, but not on the level it meant to be enjoyable. It was enjoyable in a MST3K kinda way

  7. July 27, 2010 at 9:34 am

    No I’m saying it was enjoyable to me and I’m sure other people on a remote level of fun. If you’re going to the movie for a goofball time with Adam Sandler and friends you’re getting what you paid for, it’s just that it’s not a good movie at all.

  8. July 27, 2010 at 5:54 pm

    Eh, to each his own. I do admit that I had a really fun time watching it, but it was not because of the film’s mertis…it was because you and DS are really funny guys.

  9. July 27, 2010 at 8:37 pm

    hahaha thanks, we all had our really funny moments.

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